Lockdown has been a true reckoning for my feet. In my own hermetic, unmanicured phalangeal-centric world, I’ve been living in Tevas all summer long. You won’t see a heel, well, on my heel, because what would be the point of cradling my feet in a beautiful going-out pump? Yes, my shoes of choice have been incredibly unsexy but also incredibly practical. And for a while, that was a trade I was willing to make.
But during lockdown, I’ve been wrapped up in nostalgia. I’ve been inspired by the Instagram account @fashionjunkie, which is run by a 17-year-old Brazilian girl named Alice, who is obsessed with the 2010s. There’s a lot of photos of bleach blonde Agyness Deyn, glitzy and over-the-top Christophe Decarnin–era Balmain, and vertiginous black, completely ridiculous, hot heels worn by party-hopping princesses Lindsay Lohan and Mischa Barton, and even the French Vogue editor Emmanuelle Alt. In tandem with my Insta-obsession, I’ve been on a Netflix bingse, slowly falling in love with the hot, mean Queen B Christine Quinn from the reality television show Selling Sunset. The barrel-curl babe is perpetually and sinisterly marching around in her spindly high heels—Christian Louboutin red bottoms to be specific—that she has most likely pulled from her walk-in closet. She has places to go. (I don’t.)
But even though I’ve never had a desire to wear high-high heels before, there’s something quixotic about them as the stiletto becomes more and more alluring after being cooped up. I want to emerge from the cocoon of my home sleek-ified. Every other fashion headline I see mourns the death of dressing up. Instead, we are marinating in a world outfitted by sold-out sweatpants and decently Zoom-worthy tops. But being at home is actually the perfect time to try something that I’d not normally ever wear. At home, I can experiment with bizarro trends, which in this case means imagining myself slipping on a lacquered red bottom Christian Louboutin Pigalle. For years, I have been so wrapped in the very-fashion trends of toe shoes and clunk-tastic grandpa sneakers. But there are women—Quinn, and essentially every Real Housewife—who wear these heels and look like they are ready to trample the world.
I’m not the only one who is hankering to look at something beautiful, like a dagger-pointed stiletto, either. The other day I was biking home, in Tevas, and I was on a call with market editor Alexandra Gurvitch who was waxing poetic about the bombastic appeal of YSL Tribute heels and their bossy platform. “Suddenly, I want to be wearing a full Balenciaga look and 5-inch heels,” she said. “I want to feel severe.” After months of sweatpants, an acerbic outfit would do me good.
I—along with the rest of the world—am not sure when we will emerge from the pandemic. I don’t even know if I will really ever press “buy” on those red-bottom soles. But it’s nice to play with fantasy and admire the women who wear these pieces on the daily. It’s fun to imagine a day when wearing stilettos would feel necessary, and I could put on a pair of patent leather stilts and conquer the world. A girl can dream.
